Sunday, April 26, 2015

Deals in Depewville

Dear Nieces and Nephews

Dan Depew and his delegation have returned, in what they believe to be a triumphant manner, from the state once known for it's cheese, now known for WATER PARKS.

Please refer to our previous post in April, "Wallkill Week Continues" for a reminder about the absurdity of this notion.

If you recall, Danny and Maureen Hallahan from OC Partnership ventured out to Wisconsin to study the big water parks there and to apparently have them build a water park in Wallkill. According to the Maudlin Maureen, some of the folks at Wisconsin Dells are "very interested". One of the sites being considered is part of the Distelburger farm, which Dan plans to preserve by building water slides. Another site is the OC fairgrounds which he now proposes to upgrade not replace. (When did that deal take place?)

Town of Wallkill Supervisor, DANNY DEPEW SAID:
 "We threw a pebble in a still pond and  now the ripple effects will be positive"

Wow! just like a soothsayer, or a water diviner.

Diviner Danny! Tell us, oh Soothsaying Supervisor, will those pebbles ripple the Wallkill River?

From water parks to pot facilities , Danny is putting Wallkill on the map! And in between those, Danny boy has come up with other ambitious ways to make money. One is the selling of the street signs in the Town of Wallkill. For thirty bucks 2 DPW workers will remove the sign desired and deliver it to your door. (Don't tell Dan, because he is just so enthusiastic, but the cost to the taxpayers having town employees deliver the sign may be more than the $30 in revenue)

http://www.townofwallkill.com/component/rsform/form/7-purchase-a-street-sign.html

Well now rumor has it that Dan has now graduated to selling.....wait  for it....

MANHOLE COVERS!!!

Yes, you too may purchase a piece of your favorite town and a piece of history. Wonderfully decorated, these authentic manhole covers from the Wallkill Mint are poised to become valuable collectibles!!!

These manhole covers are not only decorative but functional too! You may use a manhole cover as a coffee table (warning; not intended for use by children) or as part of a water feature in your back yard!!!

The selections range from the plain, to the historical, to truly stunning works of art.

Rumor has it the Dan will wear one as an amulet around his neck as a symbol of his  office.

To procure your very own DAN DEPEW-WALLKILL MANHOLE COVER, just call the Town of Wallkill Town Hall and ask for Dan.